Are you lonely or alone?

I'm angry, I'm upset, I'm frustrated. 

I'm at peace, I'm happy, I'm fulfilled.

I feel discouraged by what I see.

I feel encouraged through what I see.

I just want to be left alone and cry.

I just want to be with myself and breathe.

My heart is heavy.

My heart is full.

I want to be happier.

I am happy.

I am lonely.

I am alone.

What's the point of life?

What's the point of life?

I finally get it.

We could never really blame them. They don't know what to do.

It's easy to go to a bachelorette, wedding, or baby shower (tangible milestones). But how do you celebrate the 'creative' and the 'academic' (abstract milestones)?

While you're having your third child, I'm getting my third degree.  While pregnant or preparing for a wedding; they expect prayers, words of encouragement and "ooohhs and aaahhs" complimenting their progress.
No one can see the progress of your thesis, therefore they don't know how to react. So what do we expect? Encouragement, prayers, and 'you're doing well' would be nice. But how can they when they see no evidence? 

Bringing it to expectations.  People want you to do good based on their expectations of you.  Based on their subjective viewpoint. This is why the wedding, baby, house, and car is easy to celebrate and the achievements of a creative/academic are not.
Also because the creative and academics have their own definition of success and have shifted out of the 'system' created by society to create their own path.  So how can we expect them to understand?  Hence we remain quiet, have 'lonely' moments and have to continuously be our own source of encouragement. (picture)

We academics and creatives cannot blame them, they simply do not know how to respond.

I finally get it.

#noexpectations #understanding

Reality (Part 2): Is your happiness real?

Happiness is incomplete without you.

Is your happiness real?

What makes you happy?
Is it your job? Your partner? Your friends/family? A hobby?
What makes you truly happy?
I am sure you have been asked this question before. Did you notice the follow up questions all relate to your external reality, therefore I am leading your thinking in a certain direction? Was that purposeful? Maybe...maybe not. It would be great to know what your answers were though.  In Reality Part 1 I addressed what you considered to be your reality, and so you would probably answer these questions based on your perception of reality...External manifestations or an internal feeling (such as happiness linked to purpose).

What determines whether you are happy or not?
Let's begin by addressing what happiness is to you. I have experienced people who place their happiness in a person, an object or an activity. The tricky part with doing that is when that person/object/activity is not in your physical, immediate existence, they are unhappy. And then what? Sometimes we place our happiness in obtaining something:
 "Once I achieve this goal, then I'll be happy."
If this is how your ‘reality’ works, then please tell me, how long did your happiness last once you achieved that goal; or once you obtained that item? Our human existence has us searching for happiness in things and in others. I believe we have it twisted…why should the happiness only come after the 'thing'? Once you have the latest phone, you’ll be happy.  Once you get that job you’ve been waiting for, you’ll be happy.  Once you earn a certain amount every month, you’ll be happy. Once you get married to that special person, you’ll be happy.
What if I told you that you could be happy regardless of your external reality? Would you believe it is possible? Would you believe that you don’t need a single thing on this planet to make you happy (besides you)?

This is how our ‘reality’ works.
Thought > vibration/energy > feeling > manifestation.  We have a thought > it sends out a vibration > we then feel a certain way and then something > manifests. For example, you think about coffee. A vibration is sent out and you feel a desire to have coffee and know that having coffee will make you happy. So you imagine it, breathe deep and smile. A short while later, someone offers you a cup of coffee…it has manifested! Notice how you felt the feeling before you had the coffee?! Imagine applying that to everything in your life? 

But I’m currently going through a rough patch.
So something is currently making you feel bad in your human existence. How does this concept of making 'happiness a reality' fit this situation? Simple, you ignore it. Ignore what is and any aspect in your physical reality that doesn’t please you, because ‘what is’, is old news. NOW, this moment, is all that is real. Whether you think about your past – you are doing it NOW, whether you imagine your future – you are doing it NOW. This very moment is the only thing you can control and it is the only thing that is real! NOW is where it is at, this is the only place that satisfaction can occur. So breathe deep, let go of the feeling holding you hostage and release yourself into the happy feeling place… no matter what your situation or circumstance, you can feel good! No matter what, don’t ever feel bad about feeling good! You have a right to feel good…always. 

Do you set goals for yourself?
Great! Do you allow yourself to be happy before they manifest? Here’s something many are not ready or open to hear:

Everything you’ve ever wanted, do want or will ever want, already exists…all you need to do is call it into your existence.

How? The very first time you think about something and it follows with a feeling…DONE! That is how it is created! All you need to do now is to continue feeling good and it will manifest. Yes, that’s it, feel good FIRST and then everything you want will flow to you in abundance! Our society has made us believe that we must obtain what we want first, and then the happiness will follow. Why wait to be happy, when you can feel it now?

Do you ever feel stuck?
Sometimes I feel stuck at certain points in my life. I am not sure which step I should be taking next. I then ask myself: "What am I doing with my life?!" This leads to frustration. I realise that this happens when I run ahead of myself to obtain happiness found in situations/things/goals. At these times I need to slow down to allow myself to catch up to myself. I do this by doing less and being more. As soon as I do this and I am whole again, I am happy, instantly! I no longer feel stuck, I feel at peace with my life. I. FEEL. HAPPY. 

Society: “What do you want?”
ME: “I want to be happy.”
Society: “What makes you happy?”
ME: “Being happy makes me happy.”
Society: “You must be crazy!.”
ME: “The crazier I am, the happier I am.”

I. AM. HAPPY. Under all conditions, I choose to feel happy. I am unconditionally happy! And no, this does not mean I bounce off the walls with energy all the time because I am filled with so much happiness!
Happiness is peace. Happiness is deep breathing. Happiness is satisfaction. Happiness is gratitude. Happiness is letting all the barricades down and letting yourself radiate who you truly are, because who you truly are IS happy!

Your life is supposed to feel good to you!
Does it?





Reference:
Some of the above concepts have been referenced from Abraham Hicks Teachings.

Open letter to society

Dear Society,

*Quote: “Because in my experience, it is better to take any job when you’re unemployed than to wait for that ‘perfect’ job.”

I am currently unemployed.  I have a part job that brings in some money.  I have a few bills I need to pay.  I live with my parents and do not own my own car.  I am not married, neither do I have any children.  I have a BA degree in Tourism and a BA Honours in Psychology.  I have a part-time job as a Zumba Instructor and I do Hip Hop dancing, because I love it.  I am a mentor for a volunteer organisation and am currently on the committee who is running a Youth Alpha Course at my Church.  So what does this make me, society?  

I’ve been applying for jobs online, registered with many online job sites.  I have been offered two jobs…of which both I turned down. Why?  They were not what I wanted to do or I felt overqualified for it.  (*The quote above was said to me by both companies I turned down). 

Meeting up with friends, family and acquaintances and being asked the awkward question:
“So, what are you doing with your life now?” …would surely require answers such as…

”I am planning my wedding”

“I’m working for a corporate company as a *insert high profile position*.”

“I just bought my own house and a new car.” 

Then OF COURSE I would get the desired response: 

“Wow that is amazing!  You’ve really made a success of your life.” 

But, here is MY answer:

“I am currently looking for a job.” 

Their response?  “Oh shame.”

Now I stand there with a confused look on my face, like I told them that someone died and needed the sympathy?!  Follow up questions include: “So what did you study and what are you looking for?”  And then they offer advice (of which I did not ask for) on how to apply or where to look. 

Seeing as advice is so freely given in society, allow me to return the favour:

Not having a job is not a bad thing.  I do not see that merely having a job makes you ultimately successful in life.  I think and operate differently from most societal norms…I always have.  So please do not pity those who do not have a job.  In fact, I think you should praise and encourage them as they now have more time and freedom to spend on working on what they really want.  I have many friends and family who are so unhappy in their jobs, but they say:

“At least I have a job…I’d rather have a job I’m unhappy in than not have one and be at home sitting on the couch.” 

Please note that I still have a very confused look on my face…  I have never ever understood why people would do something they are unhappy doing and attribute their reasoning to some or other ‘logical’ or ‘realistic’ reason.  (Look out for my next post on the concept of ‘reality’).  And honestly, if you did not have a job, would you really only be sitting on the couch ALL day??!! 

Maybe next time you meet up with someone…instead of asking what are you doing with their life, ask “Are you happy?” Then you will get a real answer.  Why do we attribute what we do for a living with happiness?  Yes, if you are doing what you love as a job, you are happy.  But do not assume that because we are not where we want to be right then that we are not happy with where we are!  Many people are happy in the process too.  Asking are you happy shows more concern for the person’s well-being.  Now I know you are really interested and care.

As for me, I am happy.  Society, don’t freak out!  Yes, I’m unemployed, and I’m happy!  Stop trying to make me feel bad for not following your set principles!  I lived out my dream job by the age of 21.  I travelled around the world for three years after obtaining a degree.  I came back, did volunteer work for one full year.  I proceeded to study a different degree.  I made one of my passions a part time job.  I am almost thirty and I am happy with where I am and especially with who I am.  At my age, I know myself way better than I would have ever expected to.  I am in-tune with my inner self and how I connect to my higher being.  This type of happiness was not obtained by having a job, having a husband, having children, having my own car, having my own house or even having a retirement fund!

Also, please don’t assume that people who are unemployed are sitting at home on the couch all day.  How does that even make sense?!  No, we are hustling!  We are creating our dream job…that often does not exist in society.  We are sharpening our skills for the type of work we want to do… researching, developing ourselves, focussing on what we want, not what we don’t want.  We have the advantage of taking our time to find out what it is that we truly desire and to pursue that with unlimited energy!  We get to plan our lives better to make sure we are constantly improving. 

No society, you are not all wrong…although we might not be doing nothing all day, we do have the option of sitting on the couch every now and then.

I’m sorry that I am happy society.

Yours in unemployment.

Simone Momplé