I'll be back soon...

Where do I go to escape for a while?
Where do I go to get my energy back?
It leaves me in a lost state, looking for space where I can be alone.
A space big enough for me and my thoughts, yet small enough for them not to grow beyond that which I can bear.
They must know their place! It is within the parameters of optimism.
That is where I can hold them...seek them and evaluate them.
I love them...they make me feel alive still.

I watch the talks of others to numb the overthinking.
Does it help?
Often they return with vengeance as soon as I exit app.
So it leaves me breathing deeper to forget.
Hoping I find that space I seek for in my mind - as the limitations of my reality hold me back.
It is meant to be this way...it is meant for me to retreat into the lounge of my mind, make the coffee...sip slowly...relaxing...gently.

'Leave me here', I tell the world, as they keep snapping their fingers to bring me back into their space.
'LEAVE ME HERE!' Seems more aggressive to them now.
'Please', I add...

'I'll be back soon...'

Leave me here.

Leave me here.

...where I don't have to compare my life to others'.


...where social media doesn't exist.

...where I can allow my authentic self to be.

...where the smell of coffee will spark ideas that will change my world.

...where I can rejuvenate.

...where I can see myself again.

Leave me right here.

 ~ Simone Momplé

I finally get it.

We could never really blame them. They don't know what to do.

It's easy to go to a bachelorette, wedding, or baby shower (tangible milestones). But how do you celebrate the 'creative' and the 'academic' (abstract milestones)?

While you're having your third child, I'm getting my third degree.  While pregnant or preparing for a wedding; they expect prayers, words of encouragement and "ooohhs and aaahhs" complimenting their progress.
No one can see the progress of your thesis, therefore they don't know how to react. So what do we expect? Encouragement, prayers, and 'you're doing well' would be nice. But how can they when they see no evidence? 

Bringing it to expectations.  People want you to do good based on their expectations of you.  Based on their subjective viewpoint. This is why the wedding, baby, house, and car is easy to celebrate and the achievements of a creative/academic are not.
Also because the creative and academics have their own definition of success and have shifted out of the 'system' created by society to create their own path.  So how can we expect them to understand?  Hence we remain quiet, have 'lonely' moments and have to continuously be our own source of encouragement. (picture)

We academics and creatives cannot blame them, they simply do not know how to respond.

I finally get it.

#noexpectations #understanding

How does it feel?

One cannot claim to have unshakeable faith and be realistic at the same time. Choose faith, it is an unrealistic path to others, yet so real to you... Follow the happy feeling and you'll create your own reality.
- Quote by Simone Momplé


What is the point of your life? 
For me, the point is to have fun, to enjoy our lives, to relax and feel the ease of life...to be happy all round.

I've experienced how people on social media and in public are so focussed on 'acquiring' that they forget the feeling.  Grinding is great and I support all those who are working to achieve their success...but don't forget the feeling!  When you reach each goal, don't forget to feel the happiness and simply experience the joy of it. 

Feel your way through life, don't think your way through it.  A statement I am learning to apply daily in my life.  When you get an invite to go somewhere and something doesn't feel fun or good about it, don't go.  If someone recommends a movie for you to watch and you feel you don't want to watch it, don't.  When you are part of a meeting and something doesn't feel right with the plans being presented, leave.  Life is that simple.  Feel your way through your life.

Once you start thinking your way through, you begin to analyse, you overthink, you apply strategies that have failed other with people - to your life and you second and third guess yourself and your intentions! Stop!  Don't beat yourself up about anything, EVER!  You live in a world where you get to choose daily, you get to decide what you like and what you don't. Everyday you have contrasting experiences that help you to realise this, so don't worry.  I believe that nothing bad ever happens to me, only situations which make me aware of a change I need to make or a alternative path I should take.  This excites me!  When I hit a wall, I laugh, and search for the easiest path out...focusing on the feeling.

Goal setting is great, but remember that you can feel the feeling before you achieve the goal.  Imagine we made 'the feeling' the goal...and the actual goal simply occurs.  You get to feel your way to success, feel your way to manifestation.  Most of us wait for the manifestation of that car we really want and delay our happiness until then.  Feel happy now and when you get that car, you get to truly enjoy the physical experience of it.  Because, if you rely on the conditions in your life to bring you happiness, your feelings will fluctuate like the petrol price. 
  Allow yourself to create the feeling...this brings such a great change to your life.  People will want to know what has got you so happy and excited about life, and you can tell them that you chose the feeling above the condition, that you desire to feel greatness before any manifestation you desire. 

Everything you ever want already exists...you simply have to ready yourself to receive it and you cannot receive it if you are not in a good feeling place.

So, how are you feeling?

What if you were only concerned about you?

What if you were only concerned about you? 

What type of world would we live in? You might ask, well...you wouldn't care really!  Some may say that would be completely selfish, how can we only be concerned about ourselves? What about other people?  Well, they would be concerned about themselves too...So what would we have to worry about?

What are you most concerned about?  Remove yourself from the 'wars', politics, economics, tertiary education, all systems such as these. None of those are your concern.  YOU are your only concern. 

You are all you have. Everyone else and everything else in this world should never come before yourself.  Focus on you... Sometimes we get desperate to find someone who we can relate to best.

Why can't I find someone like me who likes the same things I do, or has the same outlook on life as I do?

Why would you want to when you already have YOU! The problem is that we search for someone who is like us or someone who understands us, not trusting ourselves to become the person we wish to meet. The one we wish to spend most of our time with...

Are we scared to be alone? To do things alone? To venture out into the world alone? Who goes out to parties/movies/restaurants alone?! That is crazy...right? 

My freedom came when I was able to be by myself for long periods of time and not feel anxious, lonely or sad.  I have reached a beautiful place where I enjoy the company of others, but also love my own company immensely!  I make jokes and laugh with myself (not at myself...let's clear that up), I compliment myself often (this is not conceited!) and I motivate myself when I have to (even if that requires using a Les Brown accent to do so).  Spending time with yourself allows you to get to know yourself on a deeper level.  You get to understand how you operate in different settings and you get to experience and learn new things about yourself daily.  More importantly, you will automatically be happier if all you did was focus on yourself and making yourself happy.  Being unconditionally happy...this means being happy right now!! This very moment! Not when you achieve success, not when the right partner comes around, not when you get a new car, right now, without conditions!  Can you be unconditionally happy? 

This requires you to be in constant communication with yourself, being honest with yourself and admitting 'mistakes'.  Yet, the beauty I have found is that there are no such things as mistakes or wrong choices...only chances for you to figure out what it is you want.  When you know what you don't want, you know what you do want. 

So I challenge you to spend more time with yourself to really and truly get to a beautiful place of self-awareness.  Michael Jackson knew it.  He knew that in order for this world to operate at it's best, we had to focus on ourselves first, then everything else will fall into place.

Know yourself.  Love yourself.  Take care of yourself.  You...FIRST! 

Reality (Part 2): Is your happiness real?

Happiness is incomplete without you.

Is your happiness real?

What makes you happy?
Is it your job? Your partner? Your friends/family? A hobby?
What makes you truly happy?
I am sure you have been asked this question before. Did you notice the follow up questions all relate to your external reality, therefore I am leading your thinking in a certain direction? Was that purposeful? Maybe...maybe not. It would be great to know what your answers were though.  In Reality Part 1 I addressed what you considered to be your reality, and so you would probably answer these questions based on your perception of reality...External manifestations or an internal feeling (such as happiness linked to purpose).

What determines whether you are happy or not?
Let's begin by addressing what happiness is to you. I have experienced people who place their happiness in a person, an object or an activity. The tricky part with doing that is when that person/object/activity is not in your physical, immediate existence, they are unhappy. And then what? Sometimes we place our happiness in obtaining something:
 "Once I achieve this goal, then I'll be happy."
If this is how your ‘reality’ works, then please tell me, how long did your happiness last once you achieved that goal; or once you obtained that item? Our human existence has us searching for happiness in things and in others. I believe we have it twisted…why should the happiness only come after the 'thing'? Once you have the latest phone, you’ll be happy.  Once you get that job you’ve been waiting for, you’ll be happy.  Once you earn a certain amount every month, you’ll be happy. Once you get married to that special person, you’ll be happy.
What if I told you that you could be happy regardless of your external reality? Would you believe it is possible? Would you believe that you don’t need a single thing on this planet to make you happy (besides you)?

This is how our ‘reality’ works.
Thought > vibration/energy > feeling > manifestation.  We have a thought > it sends out a vibration > we then feel a certain way and then something > manifests. For example, you think about coffee. A vibration is sent out and you feel a desire to have coffee and know that having coffee will make you happy. So you imagine it, breathe deep and smile. A short while later, someone offers you a cup of coffee…it has manifested! Notice how you felt the feeling before you had the coffee?! Imagine applying that to everything in your life? 

But I’m currently going through a rough patch.
So something is currently making you feel bad in your human existence. How does this concept of making 'happiness a reality' fit this situation? Simple, you ignore it. Ignore what is and any aspect in your physical reality that doesn’t please you, because ‘what is’, is old news. NOW, this moment, is all that is real. Whether you think about your past – you are doing it NOW, whether you imagine your future – you are doing it NOW. This very moment is the only thing you can control and it is the only thing that is real! NOW is where it is at, this is the only place that satisfaction can occur. So breathe deep, let go of the feeling holding you hostage and release yourself into the happy feeling place… no matter what your situation or circumstance, you can feel good! No matter what, don’t ever feel bad about feeling good! You have a right to feel good…always. 

Do you set goals for yourself?
Great! Do you allow yourself to be happy before they manifest? Here’s something many are not ready or open to hear:

Everything you’ve ever wanted, do want or will ever want, already exists…all you need to do is call it into your existence.

How? The very first time you think about something and it follows with a feeling…DONE! That is how it is created! All you need to do now is to continue feeling good and it will manifest. Yes, that’s it, feel good FIRST and then everything you want will flow to you in abundance! Our society has made us believe that we must obtain what we want first, and then the happiness will follow. Why wait to be happy, when you can feel it now?

Do you ever feel stuck?
Sometimes I feel stuck at certain points in my life. I am not sure which step I should be taking next. I then ask myself: "What am I doing with my life?!" This leads to frustration. I realise that this happens when I run ahead of myself to obtain happiness found in situations/things/goals. At these times I need to slow down to allow myself to catch up to myself. I do this by doing less and being more. As soon as I do this and I am whole again, I am happy, instantly! I no longer feel stuck, I feel at peace with my life. I. FEEL. HAPPY. 

Society: “What do you want?”
ME: “I want to be happy.”
Society: “What makes you happy?”
ME: “Being happy makes me happy.”
Society: “You must be crazy!.”
ME: “The crazier I am, the happier I am.”

I. AM. HAPPY. Under all conditions, I choose to feel happy. I am unconditionally happy! And no, this does not mean I bounce off the walls with energy all the time because I am filled with so much happiness!
Happiness is peace. Happiness is deep breathing. Happiness is satisfaction. Happiness is gratitude. Happiness is letting all the barricades down and letting yourself radiate who you truly are, because who you truly are IS happy!

Your life is supposed to feel good to you!
Does it?





Reference:
Some of the above concepts have been referenced from Abraham Hicks Teachings.

Women empowerment can disempower.

I have been a part of various women empowerment ventures throughout my life.  It excited me to find these groups of women willing to spend their time and energy and sometimes finances helping other women in various ways. Initially, the 'women only' part would give me mixed feelings.  I wondered why men are given the 'you can't sit with us' card.  On the one hand, I believe women should be given a space to vent, be themselves and to discover themselves as a gender; but then again, men too need a space for empowering and upliftment.  After having been involved in these ventures, one after the other, I started feeling that the inclusion of men is imperative and the exclusion of them, pointless (at times). 

You see, the more we exclude men with the 'you can't sit with us' card, the more imbalanced our society.  As the women become more empowered, they then go back into the apparent 'male driven' society they have been trying to fit into.  This can sometimes cause all efforts to be futile.  I understand the need for building women up to be more confident within society in whatever field they desire to be in and I would agree with that.  But let's not assume men don't have such a need too.  They are just better at masking their confidence with false confidence, until they make it.  So we give women the tools they need to develop more, and the men...we assume are good.

My other perception has left me wondering whether the 'women empowerment' strategies are actually doing more damage to women themselves!  As I work and play within different circles, mixed gender and women only groups and varied age groups, I get to witness various personalities and situations playing out.  Here is a something that has persistently come up across the board for me.  I will illustrate it with an example.  I have found that walking into a room where there are females only (whether you know each other well or not at all) it will take longer for the women to greet me...they would first suss me out and then greet, maybe; mostly I greet first. 
Walking in to a room with males and females, the men would be the first to walk up and greet, the females would first suss you out again, then maybe greet and introduce themselves, or not at all and you end up spending the day with them without knowing their names.  They would then converse with the person you are sitting and talking to without even acknowledging you. Blind to your presence. And it is not because the men are possibly interested in you that they will greet or introduce themselves first, I have seen this happen in all my circles. This has confused me. So it has led me to consistently be the first to greet or introduce myself...this is tiring...so I admit I don't always do it.

This has also made me consider how we are really empowering women here? Do we only empower within women only groups and not in groups of mixed gender? How does this make sense... Ladies we are disempowering other women by putting ourselves above them or even below them.  We are all equal...some might be better than others at some things, but that's normal, we all have our niches.  Be proud of other women for their efforts to learn; be proud of other women for their courage to stand up and make a change in their lives.  You have no idea how much effort it has taken for her to do something...whatever it is...support her, without making her feel less than you in her efforts.

So smile and greet every women, every time...and please don't put yourself down when you meet women you think are better at something than you...praise her, and you will automatically feel empowered.

I would love to hear your thoughts...comment below.

With Love,
Simone...a woman.