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How do you define reality? What makes something real
to you? By something, I mean a moment, a situation, an event - abstract situations,
not concrete things. So once you decide
when something is real, does that automatically cancel out any other options or
avenues of that situation? I tend to ask
many questions, which in my mind follows a path of sense, but I assume not
always to the reader. So let me explain…
I became more and more aware of people using the term
‘real’, ‘reality’ or my favourite, ‘realistic’.
They would say:
“Look at the reality
of it…it is not possible.” (referring
to anything really, mostly someone’s ability to make something happen). Many times people have told me to be
realistic when I am passionately expressing myself - talking about an idea that
I have or something I would like to pursue.
“Be realistic
Simone…that cannot happen.” Has anyone ever used that line on you? Or what about…
“Let’s just be
realistic here…”
and they attempt to explain why your idea cannot work.
I have since come up with an appropriate response,
asking:
“How do you know what
is real?” The
person will then go on to explain that MY idea cannot work because of what HAS
happened (past tense). I then respond by
asking:
“So, because this has
happened in the past, you truly believe it will continue to happen in future?”
How can someone prove that MY idea cannot work? How can they prove that just because a
certain result has occurred a number of times before that it will definitely,
positively happen again from now on?? How much do you think of yourself that you
think you are able to predict the future like that? Apparently, history has shown the evidence
that makes the future predictable! (Sarcasm)
Now let’s take a quick look at history. Nostradamus predicted the future, how many of
the people he interacted with back then told him that he should be
realistic? Einstein, Shakespeare, the
Wright Brothers, Thomas Edison, The Beatles, Michael Jackson, Nelson Mandela,
Will Smith, Jim Carrey…I don’t even need to explain the stories behind these
names. Let’s imagine that all of these
people listened to the many (and I’m sure there were very many) people telling
them to be real, to be realistic, to not try any of their ideas, that their ideas
were silly and would never work! How do
you think our society would function today had any one of them said, “you’re right, it won’t work.” Then go
work as a call centre operator (e.g.) for the rest of their lives?!
Dwell on that for a bit…
Now, back to you…what do you consider real? Are you living realistically (according to
society), or are you pushing your ideas?
Are you testing boundaries? Do
you want to pursue something no one has ever touched? Many people are scared to admit they have a
great big passion and many ideas following them…because once they admit to it,
they would have to do something about it!
We want a mediocre life with a millionaire’s salary, don’t we?
Jim Carrey once spoke to a group of graduates in
2015. One story he told plays over and
over in my mind. He explained about how
his dad could have been a great comedian, but he never pursued that, so he got
a ‘safe job’ as an accountant. When Jim
was about 12 years old, his dad was let go from that ‘safe job’ and his family
had to do what was necessary to survive.
Jim said that he learnt many things from his father, the least of which
is ‘that you can fail at what you don’t
want, so why not take a chance and do what you love!’
That line had me thinking and it also brought this
concept of reality into perspective. You
see, the pattern my life has followed is not a conventional one, not one that
society would have expected. And every
time I made a move to do something I wanted, someone was always there telling
me to be realistic and not do it, because according to them, it didn’t make
sense! Of course I had some family and acquaintances telling me I can do
anything I set my mind to and that anything is possible. But we all tend to operate on autopilot, so
we might not necessarily believe those who motivate us, but tend to believe
those who tell us it is impossible…weird!
I have come to the conclusion that my life will never make sense to you
or to anyone else…what I choose to do will never be real to you, it will never
be ‘realistic’ to you. And THAT is none
of MY business too. J
Recently I was sought out for a job, where I ended up
working for a week before deciding that this job was not for me. The lady I was working under sent me this
message a few weeks after I stopped working there:
“Hi Simon (She
spelt my name wrong…)
Just sharing a bit of
experience…in the real world…people do what needs to be done…in short we find
jobs to pay our bills and then while we are doing this…we look at other
options. If you wait for the right job
to come along…you might find yourself waiting for a long time…”
What do you make of that?!
Will Smith, also known to defy norms, said this in one
of his motivational talks on YouTube:
“Being realistic is
the most common road to mediocrity. It’s
unrealistic to walk into a room and flip a switch and lights come on. That’s unrealistic, but fortunately Edison
didn’t think so. It’s unrealistic to
think you’re going to bend a piece of metal and fly people over an ocean. That’s unrealistic, but fortunately, the
Wright Brothers and others didn’t believe that.”
Now I challenge you to redefine your concept of
reality…
